I have been on Guam 51 days. And right this moment I realized that the person that just rolled her bags out of my room is a person that I am going to miss tremendously and be forever grateful she appeared so briefly in my life.

When I landed in Honolulu, I sat down at the gate that my flight to Guam would be leaving from. I just so happened to sit next to a tall blonde in a UCLA sweatshirt, rocking yoga pants and a fedora. She was on the phone and within 2 minutes I realized that this was the other girl hired as a clubmate.

The call with her friend ended; she sat in silence, while cradling her phone in her hands. She then slowly dialed a number and stared at the screen. She didn’t hit send, she just sat there. She looked up and then back down. Whoever belonged to the number on her dial pad must be someone of importance…I could feel the energy beaming off her.

The she cleared the screen and tucked her phone in her sweatshirt. It was then I said, “Are you Kaitlyn?”

“Yeah, are you Mercedes?!”

Enter the hellos, and handshakes and smiles and excitement. Enter me finding out about her beaming pride in her recent graduate status from college and me telling her I came to Guam to mostly write.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe we happened to be sitting next to each other. I was about to call my ex-boyfriend…should I?

“I saw that. Sorry, I couldn’t help but notice the apprehension….and No. Don’t call him.”

We chatted for about another hour before our flight took off and 9 hours later we both rolled our suitcases into room 231 to start our Guam Adventure together as roommates.

Well that bubbly, huge-smile, 22-year-old Californian positive ray of sunshine has me in tears. Right this moment.

She had lost both of her grandparents a month prior to coming to Guam and had broken things off with her first love. Things that I found out in the early days of training. In 51 days I feel like I gained a sister. Sometimes,  a really annoying one that I just wanted to look at with those big older-sister eyes of “Seriously?” and have a talk with her…which I did on numerous occasions. But, with the tears that were shared, her having to listen to me and Steve fight over Skype because of the turmoil going on at home, to experiencing several bouts of food poisoning…I feel like there’s already something missing in this room. Her.

She thought coming here would help her heal…or at least take her out of the pain long enough to breathe and figure out where to go next. Well little one, I hope as you’re boarding your plane to take your flight home to your family that you are filled with a sense of peace and love and a knowing that everything happens for a reason. Because you may have taught me more in the last 51 days than any self-help book I’ve ever read.

Even though, yes, I will be glad to “Masturbate and have Skype sex anytime I want now” I will miss you more than you know. And as I read the beautiful letter you left for me, I just want you to know I love you girl.


Heeeeeeeeeyyyy sexayyy ladayyy….motha fatha gentleman 🙂

Hi there beautiful roommate,
I just wanted to leave you with some parting words from yours truly that you can read whenever you’re lonely and miss that weird blonde girl who used to give archery lessons in the next bed over. I am going to miss you so much! I know  Guam would have never been the same without you. Thank you for adding such goofy fun and beautiful, vibrant joy to my life. I know the next few months might be tough, but please always remember that you are never alone. You are one of the strongest people I’ve ever met and for that, I admire you. But I also want you to remember that vulnerability is strength as well. You don’t always have to have the answers and it’s okay that life gets a little out of hand. Because when it does, you can always grab a burger from Jamaican Grill, some kinky, and good ole Fireball Whisky…Turn on the camera, hit record, and the stage is all your for the taking. But in all seriousness, thank you from the bottom of my heart for simply being you. You have taught me so much and I hope some day I can grow enough guts to say Fuck you to someone without apologizing afterwards. Your strength amazes me and your resilience is an inspiration. Remember my big dreamer to never hold back. Look to the horizon and tell yourself, “Hey, I’m Mercedes. I’m fucking awesome. And I’m going to make Guam my lil’ bitch.” Haha. Bet you didn’t see that one coming! Love and miss you, Kaitlyn.”

So there you have it. Advice from the woman herself…Sometimes the ones who come into your life the shortest amount of time make the biggest impact.